The cliches that all say things like 'with age comes wisdom' are all incredibly, fundamentally TRUE. There's definitely something to be said for the perspective that comes with getting older. Now I'm not ancient by any means yet but in my 40+ years I am coming to understand not only my own value but also WHAT I value... and that understanding is essentially about Redefining Love.
The interesting thing now that's altered my mindset is that I now allow and apply these principles of love to myself.
I have realized that I'm no longer tolerant of not being loved fully which means that I have begun to rethink how I allow myself to be treated by all who are in my life. That also means I am allowing myself to get out of my head and into my heart much more... I am recognizing the circumstances, words, or actions that hurt me and saying to those people, "That's not okay. It's not okay for you to treat me with disrespect by not valuing me (my feelings); or not allow me to express my feelings without judgment; or simply to not care enough to recognize how your actions can or do hurt me."
I am no longer absorbing the emotional impact of the actions of others simply because I have the capacity to love them or understand them (their reasons why). I am saying "No. This is my boundary." or even scarier yet I am saying "This is how I feel" and actually telling the honest truth. I am choosing to communicate differently.
At this point, it is both terrifying and yet freeing to Speak My Truth... to say to a boss, coworker, friend, spouse, family member, or acquaintance what or how I FEEL without the need to logically justify my response. The catch however is that I am also learning to RELEASE all those people from my expectation of reaction or response in return.
Ahhhhaaaa - you knew there was a catch, right?
Yep.
You'll have to allow all those who are in your life and used to you behaving or reacting one way to get used to you responding in a new way... and that takes patience from both parties. And it takes PRACTICE.
The miracle that results however is worth the uncomfortable work in process.
By choosing to redefine love for yourself, you are unleashing the power that LOVE is to create new or renewed RELATIONSHIP with the people in your life. Again, the key here is love. This is not about unloading every criticism or hurt you've ever felt, righting past wrongs or selfish motivations... nor is it about EXPECTATIONS. Rather it is an opportunity to refine what and how you communicate so that you are doing your part to BE Present and Honest with everyone in your life.
So for this, there is only the present. You are Writing Your Vision moment by moment through your choice to actively love: Open Heart 101.
It really IS A Wonderful Life... and I am choosing to LIVE it. By redefining love of and for ourselves, we each have the opportunity to experience real depth of connection with one another... and that's a beautiful, miraculous gift.
Happy Holidays!
angela
Love really IS patient and kind; believes all things; endures all things... and at its core:
Love truly never ever fails.
The interesting thing now that's altered my mindset is that I now allow and apply these principles of love to myself.
I have realized that I'm no longer tolerant of not being loved fully which means that I have begun to rethink how I allow myself to be treated by all who are in my life. That also means I am allowing myself to get out of my head and into my heart much more... I am recognizing the circumstances, words, or actions that hurt me and saying to those people, "That's not okay. It's not okay for you to treat me with disrespect by not valuing me (my feelings); or not allow me to express my feelings without judgment; or simply to not care enough to recognize how your actions can or do hurt me."
I am no longer absorbing the emotional impact of the actions of others simply because I have the capacity to love them or understand them (their reasons why). I am saying "No. This is my boundary." or even scarier yet I am saying "This is how I feel" and actually telling the honest truth. I am choosing to communicate differently.
At this point, it is both terrifying and yet freeing to Speak My Truth... to say to a boss, coworker, friend, spouse, family member, or acquaintance what or how I FEEL without the need to logically justify my response. The catch however is that I am also learning to RELEASE all those people from my expectation of reaction or response in return.
Ahhhhaaaa - you knew there was a catch, right?
Yep.
You'll have to allow all those who are in your life and used to you behaving or reacting one way to get used to you responding in a new way... and that takes patience from both parties. And it takes PRACTICE.
The miracle that results however is worth the uncomfortable work in process.
By choosing to redefine love for yourself, you are unleashing the power that LOVE is to create new or renewed RELATIONSHIP with the people in your life. Again, the key here is love. This is not about unloading every criticism or hurt you've ever felt, righting past wrongs or selfish motivations... nor is it about EXPECTATIONS. Rather it is an opportunity to refine what and how you communicate so that you are doing your part to BE Present and Honest with everyone in your life.
So for this, there is only the present. You are Writing Your Vision moment by moment through your choice to actively love: Open Heart 101.
It really IS A Wonderful Life... and I am choosing to LIVE it. By redefining love of and for ourselves, we each have the opportunity to experience real depth of connection with one another... and that's a beautiful, miraculous gift.
Happy Holidays!
angela
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