Welcome to Write Your Vision!

Deep down, most people have dreams - they may be forgotten, unspoken, or unrealized - but they are there. I want to help you remember and believe in them again...

Sunday, November 3, 2013

No Affect

Well, it's been a while since I've written... sorry about that.  Been a tough few months.  Pretty stressful. A lot going on with family, the house, the dogs, friends, and of course work.

Everyone suffers from stress.
Everyone has issues of some sort.
And everyone has a limit to what they can absorb.
Even me.

I tend to hold myself to a reallllllly high standard, almost intolerant of my own frailties in an effort to not make excuses...or mistakes.  I juggle and juggle, reprioritizing constantly, managing incessantly, trying to keep up with the perceived and perhaps real demands of everyone and everything in my life.  I do it nearly 24/7 driving myself to find solutions to so many things - the majority of which I have very little control over.

My goal is to influence.  My hope is to make a difference.  Preferably, a positive one for my effort.

I've been trained to respond.  To react, re-evaluate, and solve... then suggest or direct.
I'm good at it actually.

That innate gift makes me relatively successful - depending on how one chooses to define the term.  My relationships rely on it, as do I because I've built them all around it.

There's just one problem.


Well, maybe more than one; but let's roll with this one first.

Have you noticed the sheer volume of demands on your life, mind and time have increased exponentially?  We are all bombarded with INPUTS telling us to DO more, BE more, ACQUIRE more, SPEND more, EAT more, EXERCISE more.... MORE MORE MORE.  The 24/7 news cycle has invaded all areas of our lives.

Volume drowns out BALANCE.

The deluge of activity and demands can bring anyone to a breaking point.

Believe it or not, I'm an introvert.  I crave QUIET.  I need time to myself to calm my mind which in turn allows me to rebalance.   If I don't create the space to allow myself to care for ME, I eventually shut down.  It's like watching your cell phone or tablet send you warnings about battery life until it's at 10% then 5% = RED LIGHT.  Then nothing.  Powering down.  The device no longer works.  As I am nearing the end of my mental battery life however I shut down peripherals - beginning with my emotions.  I control them so tightly while I'm in MANAGE MODE that they begin to erupt intermittently before disappearing in NO AFFECT-land.

No Affect is a danger zone for me.  It's when I've by-passed all healthy parameters and run full speed into the minefield of overload.  I can no longer effectively decipher the necessary difference needed to prioritize activities like picking up coffee creamer vs handling a loved one's medical care coordination.  ALL are priorities which means NONE are.  I respond in monotone.  My eyes darken.  My mind dulls.

"Danger Will Robinson!  Danger!"

Life Support on back up power only.
Uh oh............

Do you ever reach NO AFFECT-land?

Well, IF or when you do, there's a couple of options.  Once you begin to power back up, you'll no doubt realize where you are and want to leave the minefield... (or at least I hope so)!  At that point, there's hope for you/me!

Change is good in this instance.

As is GRACE.

Allow yourself a measure of grace.
Forgive yourself and everyone/thing around you for failing to live in harmonious balance! ;) lol
Recognize self judgment and choose to refuse to accept the negative statements that may bombard you.

Instead, take a moment to breathe.
Give yourself a break by allowing yourself to TAKE A BREAK.
Get off the hook of "must do" or "need to" or "should..."

DO something to relieve and expel your stress.

R E L A X.......... do whatever you need to do so you can!

The sun will still rise.  The earth will still spin.  Amazingly, those that love you will support your reprieve.

At the end of the day, simply do your best.
It may not be enough for some, but make it enough for you.

Release the trigger rather than pulling it.
Let go.

Let go.

Let go...

Deeeeep breath.  Exhalllllllllle.

If you do that, the fog will clear.
It doesn't mean the cascading TO DO list will disappear.  No.  Unfortunately, that's just life.  But it does mean, you'll be in a much better place to deal with it all again.  And maybe, just maybe, the next time you begin to reach your own version of NO AFFECT-land, you'll regroup and rebalance a little sooner.


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