Learning through Pain

Being human is okay... No one is perfect. Keep trying. Keep believing. Keep trusting regardless of the circumstances.

I am learning.

Thanks @MaxLucado for the wisdom in your words!

"Joseph couldn’t make up his mind! He welcomed them, wept over them, ate with them, and then played a trick on them. He was at war with himself. These brothers had peeled the scab off his oldest and deepest wound. And he would be hanged before he’d let them do it again. On the other hand, these were his brothers, and he would be hanged before he lost them again.

Forgiveness vacillates like this. It has fits and starts, good days and bad. Anger intermingled with love. Irregular mercy. We make progress only to make a wrong turn. Step forward and fall back. But this is okay. When it comes to forgiveness, all of us are beginners. No one owns a secret formula. As long as you are trying to forgive, you are forgiving. It’s when you no longer try that bitterness sets in.

Stay the course. You’ll spend less time in the spite house and more in the grace house”

Excerpt From: Lucado, Max. “You'll Get Through This.” Thomas Nelson, 2013-06-01. iBooks. 

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Day 3

Week 2

I believe and declare...

All of us suffer loss, endure injustices, face setbacks, even forks in the road designed to test our faith, challenge our beliefs, and try our patience and peace. Today again I am grateful for the lessons.

The Word tells us His ways are higher than our ways. I've never known this to be more true than this moment.

I have always believed in praying specifically so God could receive the glory for His work rather than victories being chalked up to chance. Part of me though was deceived into believing free will was greater than God's power and plan. That slight misunderstanding caused me such sorrow and suffering.

Today I rebuke those thoughts and words spoken...and ask forgiveness for my failings and shortsightedness. I was resisting being thrown into the furnace, praying fervently against it and wondering why my prayers seemed to be unanswered. Now I know God's plan was not to save me from the fire as I asked but to bring me through the fire with my bonds burned free... Bringing me through the wilderness, across the Red Sea into a NEW and better place.

Our God is the Alpha AND the Omega - He has already declared the day of my release - the end date for this weeping. It is coming. And when He brings me out, ALL will see His glory in the abundance of blessings and double portion of favor bestowed on me. He doesn't allow the pain, the test, the furnace without a plan for freedom on the other side twice as good as anything you had before.

As the tears flow, the Word says He gathers those to create pools of blessings.

Thank you Lord for the furnace. In it I am blessed to stand with You, see You and be closer to you... the flames cannot touch me. Those chains, the bonds tying my hands, blinding my vision, and burdening my soul are the only things melting away. 

I didn't understand it; now my heart sees it. I look forward with joy for the day of my release and restoration. No weapon formed against me shall prosper. Thank You Lord for teaching me to Count IT All JOY!

I believe and declare my day of release, healing, restoration and abundance is on the horizon. Not my will but Thine be done, always. Your timing, not mine.

I love You Lord Jesus.

Thank You for the leap, this test of faith and lesson in Trust. Keep me in perfect peace in the furnace in the meantime...while You make a way where there seems to be No way.

I believe. I trust You.

Amen.

Where to begin?

Today is a day unlike any I've known in some time. It's a day of loss (6/11/15). It's a day of learning to trust the path wherever it leads.

Despite my heart's pain, I still believe...

Despite my mind's battle, I still trust...

Despite my body's fatigue, I still move forward...

The God of all, the Alpha and the Omega still bends down to hear my cry and catch my tears. The hairs on my head are numbered as are my days on this earth. 

The Lord remains my shepherd...

...I shall not want.

Deliver me from me, Lord. Forgive my weaknesses and light momentary afflictions that cause me such angst.

Help me see with Your eyes.

Always.

Your grace is sufficient for me today...